I have been in a constant creative battle with myself. Pondering, wondering, searching – quiet frustratingly so, for my path. Which road do I take? Which path do I journey down? What door is the right one?
I have been reading a lot lately. Knowledge is power. Once you know something, you can’t un-know it. This can be a double edged sword. There is so much knowledge to be gained through reading, but the question remains the same. What do I do with all of this new found knowledge?
Honestly, I have no idea! It has bombard my every thought. I read books, listen to podcasts, and scour through e-mails and I feel as though I am no closer to an answer. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a mom. It’s everything! Absolutely everything! It’s the center of my being. Yet I feel a creative passion burning inside, looking for a way out.
As I scroll through my newsfeed, I see fellow moms working their own little businesses. Filling their creative souls through art, baking, fitness, and various other products. Here I am, like a sitting duck in the middle of a pond. I can’t see the shore and I have no idea which direction I should start swimming.
“Be still and know that I am God.” -Psalm 46:10
After talking with a dear family member they suggested I take a month to Be Still. What does that mean? It means I carry on, business as usual. I continue reading, listening to podcasts, and blogging. I don’t think about my creative path. I put that aside. I don’t agonize over the destination, I simply enjoy the ride.
June is my month. It’s my month to BE STILL.
I must admit, it’s a lot harder than I thought it would be. It sounded easy. Carry on as I normally do without all of the added debate about my life’s path. But there I was on day one, pondering all of life’s monumental possibilities. If only I hadn’t listened to that podcast or read that e-mail. But that’s not true. Even if I hadn’t done those things, I am sure I would still be in wonder. I just probably wouldn’t be doing it on day one.
For everything there is a season. So, here I am. Trying to be still. Focusing on the journey, not the destination. Or at least, I am working on it.
Copyrighted By: Boldly Bravely You