Tag Archives: share

4 Books That Changed The Way I Parent

Last spring I was knee deep in the trenches with a toddler and a baby. It was a beautiful mess. Emphasis on the messy part. My days of fairy tale play and feedings seemed to run together.

Now, I love this little #MomLife of mine, but sometimes a girl just needs a boost. So I spent one afternoon chatting with a mom of four about the changes that have transpired since baby #2. Because lets face it, every time we add a new member to the family its a huge shift for everyone involved.

In the nearly four years since becoming a mom I had read several blog posts and magazine articles sounding parenthood, but I have never once pick up a book on the subject. Then my friend recommended a book called, “It’s OK Not To Share.” It all started there, with this one book and has taken me down a path of parental growth and understanding.

Now, four books laters, I am a completely different parent.

4 Books That Changed The Way I Parent

1. “It’s OK Not To Share… and Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids” By: Heather Schumaker 

If I am being completely honest, the title sounded a bit too “hippy-ish” for my taste and I was more than sure it wouldn’t be a good fit, but I decided to check it out anyway. Now, I cannot stop raving about it to anyone who will listen! Many of the thoughts and sentiments expressed are derived from a preschool with over four decades of experience. Heather describes in great detail everything from the importance of free play, communication, emotions, understanding, creativity, and of course how to share. Honestly, the communication and understanding between adult and child is what blew me away!

(Side note: She has a second book out called, “It’s OK To Go Up The Slide” for the elementary level. I can’t wait to read it!)

2. “Peaceful Parenting, Happy Kids” By: Dr. Laura Markham

My number one take away from this book was that I needed to improve myself in order to improve my children. As parents, sometimes its hard to swallow our own pride and say maybe I am part of the problem. Once I got on board, I learned how to keep my cool in stressful situations. Thus, teaching my children how to communicate those unhappy feelings in a healthy way.

3. “Balanced and Barefoot” By: Angela J. Hanscom 

As parents we understand the value of playing outside, but this books takes it to a whole new level. The author describes the differences between the playgrounds and indoor play spaces of today versus decades ago and how that has affected our children over time. How their core strength and endurance has changed. Why running barefoot is important to your child’s development and so much more!

4. “Raising Your Spirit Child” By: Mary Sheedy Kurcinka

If you have a spirited child I encourage you to get a copy of this book ASAP! My husband and I are currently reading this together and it makes so much sense! Trust me when I say, you will know 5-10 pages in, if this is the book for you! The book talks about all those little quirks that make your spirited child unique. Things like getting dressed, mealtime, bed time, success in school, and much more! The author explains how to work with your child’s energy, intensity, meltdowns, and battles.

As a parent, I have learned it’s not all about my children’s development, but about our growth and development together. This experience is about me, just as much as it is them. As the old saying goes, I need to practice what I preach. 

What are your go-to parenting books?

Copyrighted By: Boldly Bravely You

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Why I Won’t Share My Baby’s Name With You

When I was pregnant with our first daughter a lady very bluntly asked me if I was going to find out the gender before delivery. Before I could even answer, she went on to state her opinion on the subject. She firmly believed that having this knowledge before delivery took all the joy and excitement out of the baby’s arrival. It was then, that I proceeded to tell her we were in fact going to learn the gender ahead of time. As the displeasure of my answer crossed her face, I went on to say that we would NOT however, reveal her name until after she was born.

Why I won’t be sharing my baby’s name with you:

  1. Just like the lady who bluntly stated her opinion as to whether or not I should learn the gender of my baby  prior to delivery, people will also have opinions on the name you choose. And to be honest, I don’t need to hear whether or not you like the name. Choosing a name is one of the most difficult decisions a parent can make. So the last thing any parent-to-be wants to hear about a name they have spent months agonizing over and carefully selecting, is how awful YOU think it is.
  2. It’s a SURPRISE! I love the fact that there is still something I know and you don’t. When friends and family learn you don’t plan to share the name until the birth, it makes it that much more exciting. People are very eager to know something they have had to wait nine months to find out. Plus, who doesn’t love surprises?!
  3. Stealing. This one I find a bit funny, as no one person has claim over a name. At the same time, I understand how it could feel frustrating to share a name you have carefully selected only to have someone decide to use it as well. For me, when thinking of names I do try to steer clear of using another family members name. Only because I think it could get slightly confusing if you had two Aunt Sally’s or something like that.
  4. What if we change our minds? While this was not an issue with our first pregnancy, it would absolutely be a concern this time around. Although, family members have suggested that by sharing the name prior to the birth, it would make it easier to receive personalized gifts. What IF we change our minds? Think of all those sweet gifts we couldn’t use?
  5. A story in the making. Sharing your baby’s name after the birth can result in some pretty memorable stories you will have forever. When we shared our oldest daughters name, my father had difficulty remembering it. So much so, that when his co-workers asked him the name of his only grandchild his mind went completely blank. He could not remember her name to save his life! My mother still gives him a hard time about that! This funny little story is one we wouldn’t have if we had shared the name months in advance!

Did you have a name selected before your child was born? Did you share it with friends and family ahead of time?

Copyrighted By: Boldly Bravely You

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